Babies, Botox + Body Image


It’s been a minute since I’ve done a solo show! I’m going to be honest with you guys: one of my fears is that you will only listen to the podcast if I have guests on or that the podcast will only grow if I have guests sharing the episode with their communities. But I’m moving through this insecurity and bringing the fear to light to give it less power. That being said, I am committed to stepping into this vulnerable space and doing more solo shows for you! Randomly during one of my workout classes the phrase “babies, botox, and body image” popped into my head. So that’s what we are going to discuss today! Before we dive in, I want you to know that you have permission to be in the process and on the journey. None of us are perfect!


  • I’ve always wanted to be a mother, but life has not turned out like I thought it would.
  • This year is the first time I started to feel that biological clock start ticking.
  • I don’t want fear driving me into a relationship because of pressure to get things going.
  • Even in the midst of disappointment and unmet expectations, I am allowed to hope.
  • It’s okay to want to have babies and it’s okay to not want to have babies.
  • 1 Samuel 1: Hannah asks God for a son and she ends her life with five children.
  • Mark Batterson, author of The Circle Maker, says to be bold and specific in prayer and then surrender.
  • It’s okay to be honest with God about your desire.  It’s ok to be disappointed with God. He can handle it. He is gracious, kind, and patient. He wants to be in relationship with us.

“You’re allowed to be a person in process.”  


  • People ask me what I do for my skin and the reality is that I take really good care of it (Rodan and Fields anti aging system, Primally Pure toxic free clarifying serum, hyolauronic acid)… and I also get botox.
  • Botox always felt so vain and fake in my opinion, so I judged myself for wanting it.
  • Even though I really love it, I have still felt shame about it and felt silently judged when it comes up in conversations.
  • We need to disconnect from the “should,” because then we can really unfold why we want this thing and discover if it is in alignment with who we are.
  • I judged myself because I wanted to look and feel younger. I felt like I’d be letting you down if you knew that I still have insecurities—but I am in process just as you are.
  • “Do we have space for each other to be on a journey?  Gosh, I sure hope so.”

Body Image

  • I love the body positivity movement and the fact that women like Ashley Graham are literally changing the game in the fashion industry and in our culture.
  • I do think we live in a culture of extremism, though. I’m a size 6, but models that are getting jobs are size 00 or size 12+. It still breeds the mentality of ‘not enough.’
  • Is there space for a person like me to be represented in our culture? I have lost ‘influencer’ jobs for not being skinny enough + now for not being big enough.
  • “It’s almost felt as though I don’t have the permission to struggle with my body image because I’m in the middle of the road.”
  • I overcame an eating disorder and praise God for that! (If you didn’t know that, I have an episode all about it.) I am healthy but I also have days where I don’t feel confident.
  • I was listening to This American Life recently called “Ten Sessions” where a woman goes into therapy sessions while moving through abuse from childhood. She had to give herself permission to grieve and seek healing from a sexual abuse where she wasn’t raped. She didn’t think her pain was valid because it wasn’t as bad as someone else’s.
  • “Wholeness is acknowledging that my stuff is worth gaining freedom from no matter how big or little I think it is.”
  • I hope that our culture can keep embracing body positivity and that we create a culture of honor for all shapes and sizes.

My hope is that my story reminds you that

you’re not alone,

you’re allowed to hope,

you’re allowed to be imperfect,

you’re allowed to be on a journey.

You, just as you are today right now, are enough.

Let’s talk about these things! Head over to @therefinedcollective and let’s have a conversation. I want to thank you for all of your encouraging comments, DMs, and reviews. I want to hear what episode has meant the most to you! Let us know in a review on iTunes and while you’re there, make sure you subscribe so you can get new episodes delivered to your phone as soon as they go live!

Hey, single ladies— are you frustrated by the dating world? This episode is brought to you by my free guide called “6 Tips to Activate Your Dating Life with Intention and Clarity.” These resources helped propel me from sitting on the couch to out on a date. Head over to Bit.ly/trwdatingtips to check it out! With you on the journey.

Check out this episode!


Kat Harris


CBD 101: Everything You Need To Know About CBD


Has anyone else noticed that CBD is totally having a moment? You’re probably wondering ‘What is CBD?’ ‘Can I Get High From CBD?’ and ‘Is CBD legal?’ I put out a poll on IG stories and asked you if you’d want me to have an expert on to learn more about it and it just so happens that my bestie Boronia Fallshaw is the founder of Mello. We’re recording from my bed, just like the episodes with my other besties Sara and Amanda.  

“I think it’s important, when you’re talking about something like CBD, to completely understand it scientifically so you know how it’s going to affect your body.”

What Is CBD vs THC? Why Is CBD Legal?

  • A cannabinoid is a chemical compound that exists in cannabis—there are about 85. They work with your endocannabinoid system which regulates homeostasis.
  • Our bodies already create endocannabinoids, but when we get sick things get deficient and the system doesn’t function properly.
  • You can bring your body back to homeostasis through the use of cannabinoids.
  • CBD is a cannabinoid that works with the cannabinoid receptors outside of your brain, that’s why it doesn’t give you the high.
  • THC works with the receptors inside your brain, thus causing highs.
  • CBD only recently became legalized. For a long time, it was in a grey area.
  • As of December 2018, the Farm Bill was approved, which legalized products containing hemp-derived cannabinoids, including CBD and THC. However, the concentration of THC within each product can never be above 0.3%.
  • Something to be aware of: CBD sometimes comes up on drug tests.

How To Identify A Good Product

  • “Read the packaging labels and read the ingredient labels.”
  • Check the amount of CBD. A reputable brand will list the gross amount (total in the package) as well as the recommended serving.
  • Cannabinoids only come from: stalks, leaves, flowers, buds, and stems. Seed oils do not contain cannabinoids, but can function well in beauty products.
  • See if it is full spectrum, broad spectrum, or an isolate. Make sure it is hemp-derived!
  • Full spectrum includes the limited amount of THC, the anti-oxidants, the omega 3’s.
  • Broad spectrum is the same, minus the THC. Isolate is when ONLY the CBD is extracted.

What You Need To Know About Edibles

  • A lot of cafes will have drinks that include CBD, but you should be careful of that.
  • “When you’re ingesting any edible, you’re only getting 20% of it.”
  • So if they are using an oil that is designed to be held under the tongue in your coffee you are wasting its value. If you want to add CBD to your coffee make sure you are using a product that is designed to be digested.
  • The brand you are buying from should be clear about the product being a tincture (ie: designed to be held under the tongue) vs a water soluble product that is designed to be drunk or eaten.
  • It’s important to make sure that anything you are using as an edible is being marketed as an edible. If it’s not meant to be an edible, you’re wasting your money.

How To Use CBD

  • Making sure you’re dosing correctly is trial and error. Boronia journals every day to track her responses.
  • “That got me to a point where I know that 33 mg every day is perfect for me.”
  • If you’re new to CBD products, use the recommended dosage for the product and go from there.
  •  “Get into a regime because then you’re operating from a place of fullness rather than deficiency.”
  • If you’re not feeling any change after three days, get in contact with the company you bought it from and ask questions. Figure out the best way to use it for you.

Perks of CBD

  • Boronia swears by CBD because it helps her but gives her no side effects.
  • “It’s like coming out of a really epic meditation but it’s with you throughout the whole day.”
  • Any time people say it doesn’t work for them it is often because they are expecting to feel something in their head, but that is not where CBD is at work.
  • “It doesn’t fix you, it helps your body fix itself.”
  • “How can I bring balance back into my life?”

Some Of Your Questions:

Should I get off of my anxiety medications and switch to CBD? 

  • Absolutely not—get in touch with your doctor and discuss with them that you want to try cannabinoids. Plenty of people do both.

Should you take CBD when you’re pregnant?

  • No. We don’t know the science of what it does to a fetus. If you really want to, consult your doctor.

What are the top reasons to take CBD?

  • Effective pain reliever, anti-inflammatory, anxiety reducing, helps sleep, appetite control, moderates the number of seizures people have.

What are your favorite products?

  • Boronia’s company sells bath bombs and she also loves vaping. It hits your bloodstream really quickly so you can take as needed. And, Mello just launched their own product, delicious Sea Salted Caramels with 15mg of CBD in each bite.

Boronia advises that you should just give CBD a go! Test it for a while, journal about what it does for you, and make it work for you. However, if you experience any adverse effects, absolutely stop taking it. You can keep up with Boronia on Instagram at @boroniamarie and visit her website at MelloDaily.com, Instagram at @mellodailycbd, or email her at [email protected].

If you want to learn more, head over to https://mellodaily.com/cbd-facts/.

If you like the podcast, I want to invite you to subscribe to the podcast and leave a rating and review. It helps us to get the episode out to more people and means the world to us! We’d love to hear your reactions to this specific episode and what topics you want to hear more of!

Fab Fit Fun is a seasonal subscription box that has FULL-SIZED beauty, fitness, fashion, and lifestyle products and I am so obsessed, y’all. The contents always have a worth of about $200 the boxes only cost $49.99! A few of my favorites from this box: a travel yoga mat, Vitamin C serum, and a gold eye mask. Even better? You get to customize what goes into your box! If you’ve ever thought about trying it—now is the time! If you go to www.fabfitfun.com and use code TRW, you’ll get $10 off your first box!


Kat Harris

Check out this episode!


Divorce, Online Dating, Sugar Daddies, and More


Bianca Olthoff is a pastor, Bible teacher, speaker, author, and a million other things. She and her husband began planning churches this past year and their love story is incredible. She also just released a book where she shows us how to confront the hard truths of life. Our interview was cut short because of technical problems, but we had such an incredible chat about divorce, sugar daddies, the expectations we put on ourselves, and the mentalities that hold us back.

The Heart Behind Her Book

  • Bianca’s third book, How To Have Your Life Not Suck, is a sort of manual for her 25-year-old self that was facing life’s challenges.
  • “If you are not dead, God ain’t done, sister.”
  • She looks back on these lessons and sees how they apply to her life even today.
  • “It’s your story, it’s your pain, it’s your loss, it’s your tragedy, it’s your trauma, it’s your success, it’s your wins, and no one can take that from you.”
  • We love the up and down journeys of characters in films, but when we experience the downs in life, we want none of it. But we need it to become who we are.
  • “We want the progress without the process and it doesn’t work like that.”

Confronting Expectations

  • When Bianca turned 25, she looked back at the goals she set for herself several years earlier and found she was not where she wanted to be.
  • “I’m willing to step into the hard, I’m willing to be responsible.”
  • The difference between girls and women is not a matter of age, it is a matter of choice. Choosing to step into the hard work makes you an adult.
  • “There is beauty in the work.”

On Wanting Sugar Daddies

  • “We can wait around hoping, wishing, praying that Prince Charming will come and rescue us but the truth is that if we are believers in Christ we’ve already been rescued.”
  • Bianca challenges us to prove to ourselves that we can take care of ourselves.
  • She warns us to not take it too far, though. “In our independence we can push people away.”
  • If we are open for relationships, are we making that known? Like lights on taxis, we need to indicate if we are open or shut down to the possibility.
  • “We want to complain about things that we actually have control over.”

Bianca’s Love Story

  • Bianca was in her late 20’s and waiting for God to bring a man to her doorstep.
  • She ultimately started an online dating profile on eHarmony, where she ended up meeting her current husband, who had previously been married and had two children.
  • She was confronted by the opinions of society, her family, her friends, and her church.
  • “We have an opportunity to play a part in someone’s redemption story. That is a gift. That is an honor. But let me say this: that is not easy.”
  • “When you choose that person, you’re choosing their entire life.”
  • Ruth was a widow, was barren, could no longer have kids, and went to work and caught the eye of an amazing man who loved her.
  • “The moment you walk in in this servitude of ‘I can’t believe you’ve seen me, woe is me,’ is the moment you forget who you are. Child of God, you are fearfully and wonderfully made.”
  • If you are in that mindset, it will take work and therapy to achieve a healthy mindset.
  • “There are beautiful things that grow out of really dry and barren places so don’t give up.”

Now I’m not divorced, but did this talk with Bianca make me cry? YUP. I am so grateful for Bianca, her friendship, her book, and her story. Her book just came out yesterday and you can buy it on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, or any brick and mortar shop. You can get more info at BiancaOlthoff.com or on social media at @biancaolthoff.

If you like the podcast, I want to invite you to subscribe to the podcast and leave a rating and review. It helps us to get the episode out to more people and means the world to us! We’d love to hear your reactions to this specific episode and what topics you want to hear more of!

Hey, single ladies— are you frustrated by the dating world? This episode is brought to you by my free guide called “6 Tips to Activate Your Dating Life with Intention and Clarity.” These resources helped propel me from sitting on the couch to getting out on a date. Head over to Bit.ly/trwdatingtips to check it out! With you on the journey.


Kat Harris

Check out this episode!