Podcast

Side Hustles, Career Pivots, And Learning to Listen To Your Audience

10.23.19

Do you ever think ‘When do I make the transition from my full-time job to my side hustle?’ ‘How do I choose a side hustle?’ or ‘How do I spend my time and money in a new business?’ and ‘How do I even make money in a new business?’ You are not alone. This week Stacy Tuschl, an expert in growing small businesses, is here to answer your questions! Y’all, she started her own company in her parents’ backyard when she was 18 and now it is a multi-million-dollar business. I always look to her for business advice and I can’t wait for you to hear her wisdom.

How She Got Her Start: SUCCESS IS NEVER OVERNIGHT.

·      Stacy grew up in an entrepreneurial family.

·      “I feel like everybody else could probably see it, but I didn’t.”

·      She went to school fully planning on working for someone else after college, but she wound up teaching dancing and it grew from 17 students to 100 in a year.

·      Now she has two performing arts academies that gross over $1 million.

·      “It’s been 17 years of building that business, so please know that I did not start there.”

·      It took Stacy 5 years to bring in a single paycheck. There is NO such thing as overnight success.

Making Money With Your Side Hustle

·      If you love what you’re doing in your business, the business will last.

·      “What would I do even if I never got paid for it?”

·      You can either spend time or spend money to make your business grow. Ex: spending time: doing the work yourself vs. spending money: outsourcing the work.

When to Take The Leap

·      Get Practical: It’s just like quitting any job—are you ready for it financially?

·      Take some time to ask yourself: how much time you have to give, how much money you have to invest, who do you have depending on you?

·      Stacy’s advice is to just take action, because then you can start getting feedback which will help you mold the perfect business.

Listening To Your Audience

·      You need to constantly be getting feedback from your audience because people are constantly changing and that means their needs are changing too.

·      At the end of every lesson, Stacy has a google form asking questions like ‘What did you get out of this?’ ‘Where did you struggle?’ and ‘What do you wish I would have taught?’

·      Don’t just ask the questions, LEARN from them! Give your clients what they are asking for.

 Career Pivots

·      You have to be your own individual in your business. Be who others aren’t so you can serve who others aren’t.

·      We all have blind spots in our businesses, and it takes courage to stop and reflect.

·       “Just because you don’t know what your next thing is doesn’t mean you’re not meant for it.”

·      Give yourself space to think and have an open mind for whatever is coming next for you.

Keep up with Stacy on Instagram at @stacytuscl or visit her website at StacyTuschl.com. She now has a podcast called Foot Traffic Podcast and a signature program called Foot Traffic Formula, which you can access through her website.

If you are enjoying the podcast, I want to invite you to leave a rating and review on iTunes! We love hearing what your favorite episodes are and always welcome any general feedback! It also helps us be more visible in the iTunes world. If you want to leave a review but don’t know how, head over to @therefinedcollective on Instagram and find the “Review 101” under story highlights.

Hey, single ladies— are you frustrated by the dating world? This episode is brought to you by my free guide called “6 Tips to Activate Your Dating Life with Intention and Clarity.” These resources helped propel me from sitting on the couch to out on a date. Head over to Bit.ly/trwdatingtips to check it out! With you on the journey.

XO,
Kat

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Podcast

You Were Born To Shine With Ashley LeMieux

10.16.19

I am so grateful to have Ashley LeMieux on the podcast this week. She is the founder and CEO of The Shine Project and she is currently launching her first book called “Born To Shine.” This week we are chatting about walking through grief, finding healing, holding onto hope, and how to shine in your darkest moments.

Her Why

  • When Ashley was little, she was very shy so she would write out all of her feelings.
  • “If you asked me while I was young, I would always tell you that I wanted to be a writer who helped people heal their hearts.”
  • She let doubts and concerns of others let her stray from this path of writing while she was in college, but she decided to start a blog called The Shine Project.
  • That same blog has now grown into a product line and online community for women.
  • She acknowledges that fear can prevent us from pursuing our dreams and even just finding out what our dreams are in the first place.
  • “In our heart of hearts, if we just sit still enough, I think we all kind of already know what that thing is… we just bury it with layers to distract us so we don’t have to do it.”
  • We too often let our minds jump to all the things that can go wrong.

 

Holding Onto Hope

  • One day, she and her husband were called and asked to parent a four and six-year old.
  • “At that moment, it felt like everything in our lives had led us to that point and to be able to say yes.”
  • Several years into their being a family of four, they were still finalizing the adoption process and there was an unexpected contested adoption.
  • While she was away, they found out that their children would be taken from them the next morning. She wasn’t able to see them and so she wrote letters from her hotel.
  • “Every day felt like I was carrying the weight of the world.”
  • In those moments, she saw that this painful experience was a trial of their faith. She knew that they would come out the other side.
  • “I didn’t know the depths of that pain existed.”

 

Finding Healing

  • “My healing process will be for the rest of my life.”
  • She spent time with various therapists to help with the healing process and she felt the fog of grief begin to lift the tiniest bit after one year.
  • Her big turning moment was a moment in which she looked in the mirror for the first time in a while and she was lifeless. “It was like everything had been vacuumed out of me.”
  • In that moment, she realized she didn’t want to feel the same way looking in the mirror when she gets to be 80 years old.
  • “How can I live a fulfilled happy joyful life while still feeling pain? Because they have to co-exist. They have to.”
  • From there, she discovered the difference between suffering and pain. She could drop her suffering and hold on to joy.

 

How To Shine In Your Darkest Moments

  • We don’t have to be afraid of the dark. “The light within us is brighter than any of the darkness that surround us.”
  • How can what’s burying me start serving me? When she was buried in pain, loss, and heartbreak, she decided to rise above it.
  • Give yourself permission. To dream, to find joy, to be excellent, to shine! “We don’t give ourselves permission to shine and we dim our own light. There’s already so much out there that’s trying to work against us and the last thing we need is to work against ourselves.”
  • Show up to the biggest fights of your life with love. It’s easy to get in fight mode or be in the “me against the world” mentality. Anger depletes us, but love can’t be taken away. “Once we start giving it, there’s just so much more to receive of it.”
  • Ignite the light in others. Focusing outside of yourself and serving others brings purpose to our pain. Our pain allows us to understand people differently.

If You Are Walking Through Grief Right Now

  • “Your story is not yet over. No matter how dark it gets around you. No matter how dim and bleak and painful everything feels, you were born to shine.”
  • “Sometimes, the best view we have of the stars is when we’re knocked flat out on our backs in the darkest night.”

 

You can find Ashley at @ashleyklemieux and go to theshineproject.com/tour to order her book! There, you can also see her book tour and see what city she’ll be in near you.

If you are enjoying the podcast, I want to invite you to leave a rating and review on iTunes! We love hearing what your favorite episodes are and always welcome any general feedback! It also helps us be more visible in the iTunes world. If you want to leave a review but don’t know how, head over to @therefinedcollective on Instagram and find the “Review 101” under story highlights.

Hey, single ladies— are you frustrated by the dating world? This episode is brought to you by my free guide called “6 Tips to Activate Your Dating Life with Intention and Clarity.” These resources helped propel me from sitting on the couch to out on a date. Head over to Bit.ly/trwdating to check it out! With you on the journey.

Fab Fit Fun is a seasonal subscription box that has FULL-SIZED beauty, fitness, fashion, and lifestyle products and I am so obsessed, y’all. The contents always have a worth of about $200 the boxes only cost $49.99! A few of my favorites from this box: a travel yoga mat, Vitamin C serum, and a gold eye mask. Even better? You get to customize what goes into your box! If you’ve ever thought about trying it—now is the time! If you go to www.fabfitfun.com and use code TRW, you’ll get $10 off your first box!

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Podcast

Purity Culture, Painful Sex + Debunking Shame Narrative with Dr. Celeste Holbrook

10.09.19

Are you a single woman of faith trying to figure out how to navigate dating in today’s hookup culture and online dating? I get it… it can be confusing and frustrating. This week I brought a Christian sexologist on the podcast to help navigate these murky waters. Dr. Celeste Holbrook‘s goal in life is to create safe spaces for women to talk about sex. My hope is that this will encourage you to get curious about your own sexuality.

Growing Up In Purity Culture

  • Celeste grew up going to purity conferences and wearing a purity ring.
  • Her home was not shame-filled, but everyone around her was very conservative when it came to conversations about sex.

The Moment They Were Waiting For

  • When they first had sex, it was extremely painful and not enjoyable for her.
  • “I thought I was going to be rewarded with great sex.”
  • This disconnect between Celeste and her husband began to erode their relationship.
  • “I felt a lot of shame for not living up to what I thought I should be sexually.”
  • She realized she never had good sex education. She decided to embark on a journey to unlearn shame, and to learn her body in a fresh way.

Deconstructing Sex And Shame

  • “I went through that process so that I could enter into a sexual space and feel worthy of pleasure and sex that felt good.”
  • After experiencing breakthrough and pain-free sex, she made it her mission to help others in similar circumstances and pivoted from studying behavior to sexual behavior.
  • “Although it’s a natural biological thing, it doesn’t come naturally. You have to learn how to do it just like riding a bike.”
  • Madonna Whore Complex: “You’re shamed if you have too much sex and you’re shamed if you have no sex. There’s this pendulum that we can’t seem to step out of.”

 

What Is Sexuality?

  • Sexuality is way more than just sex, desire, or physical intimacy. “Sexuality is far more than that bottom layer of what it looks like biologically.”

What Is Sex?

  • A lot of single Christian women are wondering about physical boundaries in sex.
  • 75% of women don’t climax from vaginal sex—they climax from clitoral stimulation.
  • Freud told women that to have an orgasm through clitoral stimulation is to be infantile.
  • In 1998, neurologist Helen Connoll put the clitoris into the journal of sexual medicine.
  • “Limiting the term ‘sex’ to ‘penis’ and ‘vagina’ is marginalizing and produces shame.”
  • Pleasure gets confused with hedonism, but pleasure is acknowledged in Matthew 6:26.
  • “We can’t have the conversation about pleasure and spirituality without having a conversation about sensuality.”

What is Sensuality?

  • “When we think about us as sensual beings, we are literally experiencing the creation and the creator through all five of our senses.”
  • Sensuality can be as simple as being in the moment. We can’t experience our senses in the past or future… only the present.
  • What does celibacy mean to you when sensuality and sexuality are closely related? You can embrace sensuality in these smaller ways before we have sex.

Books To Read:

If any parts of this conversation have felt triggering for you, just know that whatever you’re feeling is valid. There is no judgement. Validate your feelings and then question why those feelings are coming up for you. “Our God is one that encourages curious questions and sincere questioning.” Celeste has so many resources for you, including 20 sex-enhancing questions for freeon her website. She also offers free30-minute discovery calls. If you have questions about anything we talked about today, go to her website and click on “30 Minute Discovery Call.” She also has courses for one on one consulting if that feels right for you.

If you are enjoying the podcast, I want to invite you to leave a rating and review on iTunes! We love hearing what your favorite episodes are and always welcome any general feedback! It also helps us be more visible in the iTunes world. If you want to leave a review but don’t know how, head over to @therefinedcollective on Instagram and find the “Review 101” under story highlights.

Hey, single ladies— are you frustrated by the dating world? This episode is brought to you by my free guide called “6 Tips to Activate Your Dating Life with Intention and Clarity.” These resources helped propel me from sitting on the couch to out on a date. Head over to Bit.ly/trwdatingtips to check it out! With you on the journey.

XO,

Kat

Check out this episode!